When Christians say “for better for worse” at the altar of the holy matrimony, the good humans in the marriage end up suffering it the more. The partner with a conscience ends up being the one who keeps the peace going when unfortunately yoked with a partner who’s lagging in conscience.
I believe the number of men crucifying the wife of Nigeria’s veteran comedian, are mostly the type of humans who are already doing, or likely to do what Julius Agwu did – they would want to stand by a comrade.
The news outlets and blogs, have it that the wife of the Nigerian comedian had decided to leave their marriage, abandoning her husband who’s on the sickbed. Popular blogging outfit Gistlover, stated that she was tired of the marriage, having been the one taking care of him through the 7 years of illness.
According to the blog, she’s left the marriage for the numerous side-chicks he had, so they could also take care of the man with whom they’ve been cheating.
Cheating is one of the grounds the Bible gave for divorce, and people forget that this woman is at liberty to leave or stay – it’s her choice. Kindness has so been overemphasized in situations like this that people forget to do the right thing, hoping that to be a Christian translates into being foolish.
Their marriage is 14 years old, and like a Facebook lady Chika Alphonsus said,
“They’ve been married for 14years
7 years of cheating.
7 years of sickness.”
Some women wouldn’t stay a year with you the moment they notice your infidelity, not to mention disrespecting them with it.
If one of his nicknames was actually “knackerdemus” then his actions must have been so pronounced enough to embarrass the woman over the years.
Peace of mind is very essential in life, and if leaving him would give her a breath of fresh air, then I think it’s unfair to subject her to the level of beleaguering she’s facing from some fractions of the media.
A few months ago, Will Smith was called a weakling, a “simp”, and other types of degrading names, simply because he didn’t want to divorce the woman whom most people believe has been treating him like he doesn’t matter to her. Even when the news of her cheating on him flew across the media, a lot of people wanted him to “dump her sorry ass” as someone said.
It’s rather funny noticing that the same people who wanted Will Smith to separate from his wife, are the same ones who are against a woman leaving a husband who had cheated on her on several occasions.
People should understand that even without his flaws, she’s at liberty to end the union if it’s messing up her mind. How many men will sit beside their ill wife for 7 years while remembering how often she cheated on him? Not that such men aren’t in existence, but how many of them do we know?
Forgiveness is very important, but sometimes, it’s not a crime to forgive someone and still maintain a distance from the person. Like a Facebook user Precious Aston Ono said:
“I believe it is right to forgive the shooter and at the same time, completely disarm him.
Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily restore trust.”
I wouldn’t be surprised if Julius Agwu recovers and continues cheating on her after all her 7 years of suffering beside his sickbed.
I believe men should see this as an eye-opener on the possible outcomes of what could happen, when a wife is disrespected. Not every woman will stay to eat faeces from any man in the name of “for better for worse.” Even the good women who do so, are being taken advantage of daily.
When you show a partner a certain type of love, there will be no need to remind them of their vows at the altar of holy matrimony.
I wish Julius Agwu a quick recovery, and Nigerians should leave his ex-wife alone.
Written by: Edward Amah