An Increasing Number of Nigerian Families in the UK and US and Canada are breaking up at a very alarming rate.
It is an epidemic disease at the roots of The Family Institution.
Some say that, “Nigerian wives in UK and US and Canada control their husbands.”
Personally, that should not be a problem unless you think that it would be a problem if it were the “husbands controlling their wives!”
So I don’t believe that the issue is over “Struggle for Control.”
Others say that, “most wives who are more gainfully employed than their husbands tend to stop respecting and submitting to their husbands.”
Again, the earlier logic applies. Does it mean that the Husbands who earn more also tend to disrespect and undermine their wives?”
And save for the suggestion that “most of the cases of disrupted families stem from domestic abuse,” the rest of the suggestions sound like unending retaliation therapy without any ending curve in counselling sight for troubled families.
I read somewhere that 6 out of 10 marriages between Nigerians living abroad will ultimately end in divorce or turned to some form of short and long term separation.
If this is true, what follows will suggest that 2 in every three Nigerian women/men is divorced or “undergoing reassessment” in their marriage.
Have you been told, “Darling, we need to reassess this thing we call marriage?”
Ok! But na so e dey take start.
One day you will come home and the locks are different; changed; only 1 out of 20 men have locked their wives out abroad. Which dialectically means 19 out of 20 wives have locked their husbands out; at least on one occasion.
Ndi omere amarala onwe ha!!!
The months of October to March are the 6 months when married Nigerian men abroad are most loyal and well behaved. Its also a flower buying period; eat out and weekend getaways. Surprise packages for Madam.
You might want to ask me, “Uncle Mike, why that period?”
Enyia, achupu gi na winter, na for inside car you go sleep under cold o.” Akpa amu gi ga asuko cha ka eju ahuru na oku. Your container will look like roasted snail in the morning. Imi ana agusicha gi.
You will pray to have shell like tortoise; mbe.
But if na woman wey still love you and wan give you another chance, she go make hot Colombian Latte give you in the morning with a smile when she opens the door; and she go wear something wey go make her nipples stand out. That’s how you will forget all the cold nights and all the things you don plan finish.
But if you are locked out in summer, you will wind down the family Van or truck and sleep well with nice music. If you try it during winter, you will learn how to wash plate and clean the house and fix all those broken things you keep saying “I will do… I will do..”
But seriously, what really is the main “bullet” striking at the heart of marriages within the Nigerian communities in UK, US and Canada?
The wider effects on the children is still under extensive studies and research as troubling data and statistics keep coming in; a higher propensity for anti-social behaviours (not necessarily violence) amongst children raised in single-parent homes.
May monkey never dash you banana.
Written by: Mike Ikem Umealo
